Little Old Ladies

I am not the type of neighbor who visits often, chit chats, etc. I have so many hobbies including writing, the piano, crocheting and knitting and music and the internet and I prefer those activities. Today, however, I made an exception. My neighbor in the next apartment invited me for coffee at her place at 2 p.m. She looked nervous asking me and looked lonely and looked hopeful and I just didn't have it in me to say no. So, off I go at 2 p.m. 18 steps to her door, carrying my small oxygen tank. I knocked once and the door swung wide open suddenly. I felt a little bit like a fly entering a spider's nest but I bucked up and stepped in. I always had my tank if I had to protect myself.

The apartment was immaculate with nice old furniture and curtains, knick knacks, etc. popular in the 60's. Her small dining room table was set with a green cloth, a nice Christmasy centerpiece, and 4 plates, cups and saucers (no one but me showed up :( She served 1/4 cup of red jello with tiny cinnamon candies in it, interesting. Pink angel food cake with red icing. A small dish with about 12 nuts on it. Fortunately, nuts are not allowed on a renal diet. Nor is coffee but I cheated and drank about 1/4th cup and had one cashew.



During the conversation, I nearly cracked up. Her hearing aid battery went dead about the same time my oxygen tank ran out of power. I can go about 20 minutes without oxygen but her hearing was gone! She jumped up and got her battery, clearly embarrassed, and I started counting down my minutes without air.

She told me her husband died 10 years ago (as did mine) and that she was lonely and was sorry she had sold her house and moved here (so am I) because her kids never visited. Familiar story of women who've lost their men. She said that I (me) am the youngest woman in the building. She is 84. She has absolutely no hobbies, no interests beyond some TV re-runs. When she asked me what I did, she looked mystified when I mentioned the computer. I told her I'd be glad to teach her how to use one, but she wasn't interested. She'd rather I go with her to McDonald's on Sunday and maybe to Hyvee's (grocery) once in a while. She didn't invite me to her Lutheran church, not being too keen on Baptists. :)

So when my air time ran out, I thanked her for the coffee, cake, jello and nut and made my way home. She thanked me for the candy and trinket I had given her. I promised I would go with her to Hyvee's and McDonald's occasionally. I really don't want to do that any more than she wants to do the computer but I don't have the heart to deny her. She's lonely.

Jas 1:27 Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself un-spotted from the world.

That means if we have a pure religion, we will visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and will keep ourselves clean from the stains of the world. As a Christian, we cannot just do what pleases us all the time. We are not here alone and we need each other. I am proud of my self sufficiency but I also am a Christian with a heart, and that's a good thing and she may do as much for me as I do for her. Who knows?




I am turning into a hermit and that jello tasted quite good and I'm not suffering over the one cashew nut I ate. :) All silliness aside, I liked her.

I Hear Christmas Songs

I was playing Civilization III on my computer but listening to the TV in the background, ice skating. After a while, I realized the music was Christmas music, the first I've heard this year. I love Christmas music. Two of my favorites, one religious, one secular are these two that follow. John Berry who is singing O Holy Night has eyes like John, just not quite as green and Jon Bon Jovi is such a delight (hmm, he also resembles ...) so I am posting his version of my favorite tune, Blue Christmas. I usually prefer Elvis' version of the song.

O Holy Night by John Berry

Blue Christmas by Jon Bon Jovi

I usually wait until a week or so before Christmas before putting up ornaments, etc., but now I've gone and gotten in the mood. :) Before you know it, I'll be up to my elbows in Nut Bread dough.

Some of the greatest gifts God gave retired people are computers (to stay in touch with friends free), television (to watch the hunk of the month, uh ... I meant movie of the month and enough free time to enjoy both.

I saw all my favorite shows this week on television including The Mentalist with Simon Baker. I was distressed to learn that Simon Baker is thought to be gay by 63% of people although he is married with three kids. I'm not down on gays but I don't lean in that direction. Whatever, he's still good looking and 'hot.' Simon Baker has signed a Mind Blowing $30 Million Contract with Warner Brothers for his role of Patrick Jane on CBS’ Hit Series ‘The Mentalist’. This amount guarantees the Austrailian Actor $430,000 an episode. As if his paycheck is not enough, Baker will also be now credited as Producer when the 5th Season begins. Additionally, he will receive back end profits from Repeat episodes on TNT network. Nice going Mr. Baker (also known as Simon Denney).

Speaking of hot, my latest infatuation is the guy who plays E. J. DeMeara on Days of Our Lives. Whooeeee!

Oh My!

I had a wonderful holiday with my daughter and all four grandsons. First time we've all been together for years and the very first time at my place with Jayne's husband also in attendance. We had a huge dinner. There are enough left overs to feed me for a week or so. My favorite dish was the sweet potato recipe. They all left today but Jayne stopped in and told me good bye. The three older boys will go back to Iowa City soon, they go to the university there. We'll probably get together again at Christmas.

I don't know what caused Jayne's change of heart but believe God answered my prayers, been praying for years to heal our relationship. John's post today reminded me that we have to wait for God's time for His timing and purposes are correct.

Bible, Books and Brides

Jayne took some good photos. She will unload them from her camera and send them to me by eMail. I'll post some later. I was happy to see that I look so much better physically. This time last year, I was at death's door and started my dialysis. I was very overwhelmed at first and I've had five surgeries and two pneumonias in the past year but here I still am. :) Praise God from whom all blessings flow. And, thank you to so many dear friends who prayed for me and encouraged me. John, I don't think I could have done it without your encouragement. You all have no idea how you helped me hold on. Thank you much.

And, as always,

God Answers Prayers

Most of my life, I have prayed every day. I was taught that to 'pray without ceasing' as we are told in the New Testament to do is to pray every day, at least once. The only days I have not prayed were when I was sick and unconscious and I wonder if I didn't do it in my altered state since I was so used to doing so. :) I try not to pray for trivial things for myself but sometimes I do feel like the 'fiddler on the roof,' who sang 'Wish I Were a Rich Man.' As he said, would it be against some mighty plan to let me have wealth? :) I have never prayed for wealth. I do pray for health sometimes. He did say we could bring our cares to Him in prayer along with our worship of Him and intercessory prayer for others, etc.

For many years, I have prayed for a better relationship with my daughter, Jayne. She was not any trouble to raise, made good grades, never got into any kind of trouble and her reputation was spotless. But, she didn't like me much and I never could figure out why not. I tried and think I was a good mother, not perfect but not bad. I just didn't know. So, year in and year out, I prayed. In the meantime, I tried my best not to bother her or her husband and I never interfered in how she raised her kids or any other way that I can recall.

Recently, she moved to Michigan which left me alone in Davenport as my older grandsons are in college in Iowa City, Iowa, all but one who is with her. My sweet Kevin. Here he is, praying with his guitar. :) Jayne and her husband are not believers but she allowed me to church the boys as they grew up. When I was still able to go to church, I took the boys with me, and the older ones were baptized in my church when they were younger. Kevin has been attending a private Catholic school, and he likes it.




Back to prayer... since they moved to Michigan, Jayne has called me often. She is coming to Davenport as are the older boys for two days next week to celebrate Thanksgiving for me. This is a big change. Her husband has never sat down in my home, ever, before, much less eat a meal with me. She is going to cater the bigger portion of it, supply the larger table we will need for three adults and four children.

Lately, she has told me that she appreciated all that I did for her and how difficult it must have been at times, when her father was gone or when I was sick or had to travel for work.

At first, I almost didn't believe it could be true. I waited for her to call back and say, 'not going to happen, it was a joke.' See, I was so used to praying for it not really believing and no wonder my prayer was not answered for so long. When we pray, we must have faith, believing He will do what is best for us. In the long wait, I didn't always have faith and really never believed, after so many years, that it would happen. I think she will be here next week and I believe what she said to me was sincere. God has answered my prayer.

I wonder now how many other prayers I have prayed without having a strong enough faith. I have asked the Lord to forgive me for my sinfulness and I will try to be faithful and grateful when I pray. I still pray every day though and most of the prayers are not for me so I believe He heard those prayers and answered them sooner.

One of the preachers in my youth said one time that God shakes us out like corn being husked to get our attention. :) Well, He shook me for years. lol I will be so happy if she comes and all goes well. I believe she will. Something or Someone has changed her heart.

I hope you and yours have a great Thanksgiving with those you love. And, as always,

Sad Songs and Thunderstorms

There are ways that I am unlike most people. While most people are made happier by sunshine, happy songs, and gatherings on holidays, I am just the reverse. My favorite songs are sad songs. On Christmas, my favorite song is 'Blue Christmas' preferably sung by Elvis. It goes, 'I'll have a blue Christmas without you. I'll be so blue thinking about you...' I listen to it over and over, alone. It's not about anyone in particular although there are people I miss of course. My husband Bill, good friend Tom who died two years ago, old friends in Virginia and West Virginia are missed but I've loved the song since childhood.

I do not like to be with people on Christmas or any other holiday except New Year's Eve. I love New Year's Eve, especially at midnight. Mostly I love surviving another year and looking forward to another. I do love life, very much so. My daughter and I exchange gifts, etc. a few days before Christmas and then she has Christmas with her family and I have mine alone, just the way I like it. No gifts, no tree, no lights, just me and a cup of tea and a good TV show or favorite movie on CD. I do NOT feel sad. I feel good. The only thing that would ruin my mood would be the door bell ringing. This year, for the first time, my daughter wants to come to Iowa (she's in Michigan) and bring all four children and her husband for a big feast she is going to cater. I will probably have to take a Xanax or two when all six of them join me in my small apartment just to get through it all. I'm just not used to the company, but we do things for those we love. I can always listen to George Jones singing 'The Grand Tour' after it's all over. Now that's a really sad song.

I also like bad weather. One of the worst punishments I ever received as a child was for standing in the rain in a middle of a bad storm with lightening dancing all around. They had a saying in those days .... 'too dumb to come in from the rain.' :) I am not dumb but I love a storm. Sometimes, my grandmother and I sat on the long wrap-around porch of her home, in a porch swing, with blankets around us as it rained and rained. I loved it. She made us some Sassafrass tea, such a lovely aroma and wonderful taste, the perfect drink to tide one through a perfect storm. This week, the first wet snow of winter hit us here in Iowa. I liked the big wet flakes hitting me in the face. While everyone else was complaining about the cold Iowa winter coming on, I felt wonderful. The only reason I don't stand out in the snow is because I'm rather cold natured and my hands and toes freeze. I do stand at the window and watch it snow, especially at night when the star light catches a twinkle or two on the snowflakes.






I do not totally understand my 'perverse' behavior although I have my thoughts on the cause of it. I love people and I think most people like me, some even love me. I enjoy small social gatherings sometimes, love going to church, love to chat, talk on the phone, write letters, etc. I enjoy the good news in others' lives and wish everyone well. I have always been blessed with many friends. I think deep down I just don't trust 'happy times.' They don't seem to last. I don't believe 'all's well that ends well.' Does it ever end well? Heaven will be a new beginning but death, that's not ending well. I take God's word that 'all things work toward good for those who love the Lord.' Like in most things, I accept His Word. I just haven't seen it in action in that particular instance. Maybe it works for His good or the good of the world. I love the Lord very much but don't like kidney failure, cancer, and a host of other ailments and tragedies. I don't think I really understand the verse. Where is John when I need him? :) Right where he always is, willing to help.

I remember when I was a little girl that my 'spinster' Aunt Aileen used to open her Christmas gifts alone in her room, except for me. I was maybe six or seven. She would not say a word, would give me anything she received that she thought a child would like such as perfume or lacy things or note paper. She would pack up the rest and we'd go have a cup of tea. Hmmmm. Maybe that was the beginning of it. I loved her so much and not just because when she was 18 and I was eight, she gave me 12 boxes of paper dolls that she had saved all her childhood. She also introduced me to Elvis when he was on TV one night when she was 17 and I was seven. She lived with her parents, next door, and she ran into our house yelling, 'Iva Mae, Iva Mae, you've got to come see this gorgeous man singing on TV. You're not going to believe it.' :) What a night that was!

I hope this doesn't depress you. When you have your Thanksgiving or Christmas gala and think of me, think of how happy I will be listening to my sad songs, drinking tea and looking forward to a nice nap ... unless it's snowing, of course, when I will be holding my tea while I stand at the window and watch it snow. :) I am happy and content most of the time. Anyone who knows me well, knows that.

Well, enough of delving into my mind. The holiday season is upon you and I wish you the best Thanksgiving and a very merry Christmas. I hope we have snow in Iowa on Christmas this year.

As always,

Booooo! Are you frightened?

This is Halloween weekend in Iowa. Every state seems to have different dates, seems to me. I have always loved Halloween. There's a weird part of me that enjoys being frightened... somewhat. I like reading scarey stories or about weird or frightening occurrences. Here are a few about...

Strange Deaths!
The “King Who Ate Himself to Death” died in 1771 at the age of 61 from a digestive problem after eating a giant meal consisting of lobster, caviar, sauerkraut, cabbage soup, smoked herring, champagne and 14 servings of his favorite dessert: semla, a bun filled with marzipan and milk. 14???


Homer and Langley Collyer were compulsive hoarders. The two brothers had a fear of throwing anything away and obsessively collected newspapers and other junk in their house. They even set up booby-traps in corridors and doorways to protect against intruders. In 1947, an anonymous tip called that there was a dead body in the Collyer house, and after much initial difficulty getting in, the police found Homer Collyer dead and Langley no where to be found. About two weeks later, after removing nearly 100 tons of garbage from the house, workers found Langley Collyer’s partialy decomposed (and rat-chewed) body just 10 feet away from where they had found his brother. Apparently, Langley had been crawling through tunnels of newspapers to bring food to his paralyzed brother when he set off one of his own booby-traps. Homer died several days later from starvation.

In America there was a mass murder. Policemen went to investigate. Trying not to tread on the bodies, they took pictures of each one. One policemen saw something on the opposite wall but he couldn't
read it. He walks over to it and sees the numbers "7734" in calculator form, written in blood. When taking pictures of this, he turned his camera upside-down and told an approaching police officer. When he pointed with the hand that the camera was in, he accidentally took a picture of the upside-down numbers. He was about to delete the picture when he realized something. The numbers were now a word. The word was "hELL."

Meanwhile ...

I'm expecting a few children of friends for trick or treating. Am making some cookies and popcorn balls but have some store-bought candy for those fearful of home cooked food. After they leave, may re-watch 'Red-rum' or some other frightening movie and have some tea.

Hope you enjoy the weekend and

Glorious Autumn

It is a glorious day in Iowa, in the low 70's at 3 p.m., a mild breeze, a fall-in-the-air kind of feeling when my face wants to look up and seek the sky and my clothing feels just right on my body, not too loose, not too tight, when everything seems so well with my soul. If you can't tell, fall is my favorite time of the year. I look forward to no humidity, no sweltering days. I think of pumpkin pie, Halloween coming up when my little-children friends visit and then on to Thanksgiving. Winter is supposed to be worse this year in Iowa than last, if that is possible, but right now I have autumn to enjoy. :)

I also think of some close friends in autumn, friends who have died and left me behind for now. I wrote this poem a few years ago (copyright 2010) and it has been my most 'popular' poem so far and I also like it best myself. It is in free verse (not rhyming, etc.) Hope you enjoy it.

Always Autumn


It's always autumn when I think of you most,
hunched over in the tan sweater I knitted
with leather patching on the elbows,
reaching almost to your knees.
I never could follow a pattern well.

You would throw out our blanket for our feast,
your knees crunching leaves as you knelt majestically
and patted it into place before anchoring it with a pumpkin
or two and a plate for the cheeses and bread.
You always set a fine looking table.

After all was placed in proper order, you opened the wine.
We touched our glasses and thanked God for another year.
We sat looking at goldenrod sway as gentle winds puffed.
Fields were gold and green as far as we could see.
Your father's beautiful land was always like heaven.

We talked of small things and touched finger tips,
sang old folk songs that made us recall those days
not long past when we met and finally knew we belonged,
that we were not outsiders after all. What joy we had.
Our Father had a plan for us all along in His pattern of things.

I think of you often when the sun shines, when the rains pour,
when the storms howl and when it blows feathery snow.
I think of you when I'm in a crowd, when I'm lonely.
When I'm misunderstood, I crave to hear your voice.
But always, I think of you in autumn.

© Copyright 2010 iva*mae (UN: crankee at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.

While I sometimes think of the past and remember loved ones (so many of mine have died, many dying too young), I do not dwell on the past. I live very much in the present. I do not try to look that far ahead. My plate is full as it is, but I do not dread the future either. Good things happen all the time and I am always excited by news, politics, movies, new finds in archeology, new insights into the Bible, etc. I am never bored -- really, never bored.

I do not dwell on days now gone,

"I plead with you not to dwell on days now gone nor to yearn vainly for yesterdays, however good those yesterdays may have been. The past is to be learned from but not lived in. We look back to claim the embers from glowing experiences but not the ashes. And when we have learned what we need to learn and have brought with us the best that we have experienced, then we look ahead and remember that faith is always pointed toward the future." --Jeffrey R. Holland, "The Best Is Yet to Be"

When I do look ahead, some things are scary. Like Rick Perry :) Did you see the last debate? His hair, craggy face and cowboy swagger didn't help him much. He started 'losing' the debate when he said the following (conservatives are all for 'immigration reform.':

“But if you say that we should not educate children who have come into our state for no other reason than that they have been brought there by no fault of their own, I don’t think you have a heart.”

Some commentator said: "Now here is what I know about Republicans and conservatives. They hate being told that they have no heart. They don’t have hearts, but they don’t like being told that they don’t, and I know this to be true because as a liberal progressive I have told them that many times. They don’t like being told that by liberals, but I am willing to bet that they would absolutely hate being told that by one of their own."

I suspect Perry voted for educating immigrant children because so many former immigrants vote but who knows? He doesn't have a heart for prisoners on death row, even those where the slimmest of evidence convicted them. He has allowed so many to die without a hint of remorse, by his own statements. He doesn't have a heart for the millions of people on Social Security (I receive Civil Service retirement but I do have Medicare Part B for a hefty premium) who have no other income.

Well, enough politics today. If we have to have a Republican president, I hope it's Mitt Romney. I do think he is a decent man even if his religious life is skewed. Most of us don't stray from what we are taught as children. If you ever want a good discussion on Mormonism, email me. I've studied it most of my life. The man who tried to destroy my life was a Mormon but I found out his evilness had nothing to do with being Mormon.

I'll leave you this beautiful Sunday with this song. It makes me tremble.

Revelation

As always,

And then... they tied her to the railroad tracks

If you're too young to know what the title means, I'll be too depressed to explain. :) Let's just say, to me, it means when a terrible event happens in your life over which you have no control.

When I was a very little girl, I was very outgoing. I could sing and play piano in church by age seven. I was in school talent contests for the first four years I attended school. In second grade, when I was just six, for talent contest, I dressed like a French woman with a tight skirt with a split up the side, high chunky heels, a red top and a dark beret on my head. I sang and danced (on top of a piece of luggage we called 'suit cases' in those days) to this song.

Sentimental Journey

I won. In the third grade, I danced to 'April Showers' with three friends, and we won second place. We danced while twirling paper umbrellas and wearing pink ballerina shoes with white dresses.

April Showers

In the fourth grade, I did a recitation -- the words of Mary, Queen of Scott's before she died. I won second place.

I use to tap dance on top of our dining room table to a song called 'Hadacol Boogie' and friends of the family would throw quarters at my feet.

Hadacol Boogie by Jerry Lee Lewis

I was a happy, smiling, fun-loving kid. Then tragedy struck. I know that sounds melodramatic, but it's true. Awful things happened to me and my brothers and life was never the same.

While I continued to play piano and sing at church (with my cousin, Pam and more of an obligation than anything else), I never again entered any contest, became very much an introvert, and very studious. A 'brainy brat' they called me. I graduated second in my class (I did make a short salutatorian speech at graduation but did not look up once). I didn't come out of this 'funk' for many years.

What happened to me wasn't all that unusual but, for me, it was life altering. I've often wondered if it was my 'destiny' or if it was my destiny 'altered.' Was it God's plan or God's plan altered? At the time, I thought that I had to 'take control of things' to avoid another 'incident.' I thought my destiny was in my hands. After all, the Bible said 'we had to choose' our destiny or I thought that was what it said. I believed I had to be ever vigilant, that somehow I had 'allowed' the incident to happen, that it was 'my fault.'

I have learned a lot about life and destiny, mostly that I have little or no control over it all. I think we do make choices and suffer (or enjoy) the consequences of them but ultimate destiny belongs to God. I believe we choose how we react to events. I could have allowed the 'incident' to ruin my life or even have ended my life because of it. Instead, I chose to gather up what was left of me and get on with it, that is, get on with life.

I eventually finished school, went to college, met a great guy, became a mother and lived life as best I could. I never turned my back on God nor did He abandon me. But life was different. Do you think things happen to alter God's plans or were they His plans all along? I find it difficult to believe that He preferred the sad, studious, shy girl to the lively, spirited girl I was but maybe so. What do you think?

Me, in fifth grade. There's a flaw in this photo, I did not have a dent in my forehead although I felt that way sometimes. :) I call this my Franenstein phase. lol

Ecc. 9:11 says "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favor to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."

This means to me: Happeneth to them all - Every man has what may be called time and space to act in, and opportunity to do a particular work. But in this time and opportunity there is 'incident,' what may fall in; and occurrence, what may meet and frustrate an attempt. These things should be wisely weighed, and seriously balanced; for those four things belong to every human action. While you have time, seek an opportunity to do what is right; but calculate on hinderances and oppositions, because time and opportunity have their incident and occurrence.

My life was different after age ten but no less precious. Ecc. 9:4 says something like 'it is better to be a live dog than a dead lion.' I don't know what my life would have been like without the the 'incident' but it has been worth living. I learned things from what happened that caused me to be much more compassionate, kind and loving than I would have been otherwise. Do I wish I had not had the 'incident?' Yes, if for nothing else but to know how I would have 'turned out.' Perhaps I would have been a vain person with nothing but trifles accomplished. Perhaps not? I wonder if God will let me know some day.

Back to this world I now occupy, I am content. With what I was given, I believe I've done my best. I have called upon God since I was seven years old and I found Him and He has held me in his loving arms. As Psalm 23 tells me, I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Amen.

Jer. 29:11-13 "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

As always,

Beware the Dogs

I was in the book of Isaiah today for my bible study time. I am sure I read this verse before but don't remember having questions of it until today. Isa 56:10 "His watchmen are blind: they are all ignorant, they are all dumb dogs, they cannot bark; sleeping, lying down, loving to slumber" I know that dogs are considered to be rather dirty and lazy in the Old Testament so to call the watchmen dumb dogs is pretty insulting. I believe the worst thing that could happen to one then was to be eaten by dogs. So who are the dumb dogs spoken of here, the actual watchmen of the city or the prophets or who? I assume since it was said they could not bark, they could not 'warn' someone when necessary. I'll have to leave it for another day unless some fellow Bible scholars here can help me out.









I have spent most of the day watching tennis semifinals. Did anyone else watch the Djokavic vs. Federer match? Absolutely a great game. Djokavic pulled it out at the last minute after about four hours of grueling play. I think he's great but I have a thing about tall, thin, aggressive guys anyway. :) He is from Serbia. His interaction with the crowd/audience today was interesting. Their applauding Federer more seemed to bother him until he actually won. Men? Who can understand them?

Other than watch TV like the lazy dogs who do not get their work done, I did make some great spaghetti. Enough for me and froze enough for three more meals for someone. I had some fresh peaches. I had one even though the renal diet forbids almost all fresh fruit. Needs to be cooked to be acceptable. Since my lab work is always pretty good, I chanced one little peach.



I always read Yahoo news every day. They list the important down to the implausible. Today I read of this fellow, a 20-foot 'monster' crocodile captured in the Philippines, weighing about a ton. He is awesome! He apparently is stressed out over the crowds and being captured that he won't eat, but he can go six months without eating. Wish I could.

Some other things in the news... will Hillary run for President since Obama has lost popularity? It could happen. Edward Kennedy ran against Carter when he lost popularity (didn't win). Why aren't blacks defending Obama more and will they turn on him in 2012? How many scandals will be dug up on Rick Perry; one has been found so far. Will Obama's job plans make a difference? Certainly hope so but wonder how much he can do without the Republicans, the 'just say no' crowd. Can he even get a bill through congress?

Well, going to have a cup of tea and watch a little more tennis and then a movie. Definitely a lazy Saturday. Saturday is now my favorite day of the week, no dialysis on the weekends and not as busy a day as Sunday. Hope you are enjoying your weekend and, as always,

Summer Time

Summer time and the living is easy, according to Sam Cooke - Summertime

Today was wonderful here in Iowa, temp in the 70's, nice breeze. I loved it. I was able to go to church today, a new friend taking me. Came home and fixed us some home-made onion rings, the thin kind I like, and some stewed squash, stewed in water, butter, onion diced and a small pinch of nut meg. Salted to taste. It all was wonderful. I am not vegan but I don't eat much meat, some stewed chicken now and then. That was lunch. About 7:30 p.m. made me some berry pancakes. Sometimes breakfast food is so good at night.





During Sunday School, a lady asked 'if God created the universe, who created God.' Our pastor gave the best and simplest answer I've heard so far for this question: He said:

"The universe (including time itself) can be shown to have had a beginning. It is unreasonable to believe something could begin to exist without a cause. The universe therefore requires a cause, just as Genesis 1:1 and Romans 1:20 teach.

God, as creator of time, is outside of time. Since therefore He has no beginning in time, He has always existed, so doesn't need a cause. He just 'is.' We who are trapped/controlled by time have a difficult time believing in 'timeless' existence but it is so."

In the news today, heard this very good news (to me anyway, having 'pain issues' as the young folks say. The medication I receive is very strong and effective but side effects that make life more difficult.

The article said:

"Saliva from humans has yielded a natural painkiller up to six times more powerful than morphine, researchers say. The substance, dubbed opiorphin, may spawn a new generation of natural painkillers that relieve pain as well as morphine but without the addictive and psychological side effects of thetraditional drug. When the researchers injected a pain-inducing chemical into rats'
paws, 1 milligram of opiorphin per kilogram of body weight achieved the same painkilling effect as 3 milligrams of morphine."

They believe they can synthesize the substance and begin to produce pain medicine from it soon. I hope it works... whew.

If you are a reader, check this out: Amazing number of good, and FREE ebooks

A ? for John: How do neurotic narcissists behave and should we avoid them?

As you must notice, my mind goes from one thing to another. I am overwhelmed most days at what I want to know or do and there is not enough time to do it all. :( But I still have tomorrows :) Thanks to God, prayers from loved ones.

At the near ending of this day, may

Nothing Like a Dame!

I was chatting with a good friend and about half way through the conversation, I realized how much fun I had with her, how much she makes me laugh when there's not that much to laugh at, and how she encourages me when I am down. The thought went through my head, 'there's nothing like a dame.' :)

I love men, oh yes I do, and I spend a lot of time trying to appeal to a man. I do have my little bag of tricks and know how to use them. But when I need someone to talk to who really understands, it is most often a woman friend. Men can relate, up to a point, but they never, in my opinion, really understand how a woman feels. I don't think they can. Men and women, after all, are different and especially emotionally. Not saying they don't care, they do. It's that they don't 'feel' things as intensely as a woman and are not as nurturing. It was meant to be this way. This friend I was talking with, I've not known too long but I know what I like in a friend.

I have other close friends, Linda and Brenda, twins, who have been my friends since junior high school. Through thick and then, good times and bad times, we have remained good friends and I still love talking to them.

Here they are at our high school prom, Brenda on the left. They ended up marrying those boys who are brothers, Larry and Bill. Both have had wonderful marriages and are wonderful people. I'm so glad they 'took me in' their fold. Thank you, Lin and Bren, and God. :)


Today was a good day, a non-dialysis day. Slept a little longer, had some wonderful strawberries and real whipped cream for lunch. Did some crocheting. I am making some hats which I will give for Christmas gifts to the nurses at the dialysis center who are so very good to me. I like this pattern, tell me what you think. I call them slouchy hats.

My daughter called me from Michigan. She and her family get to finally move into their new home in Rochester Hts., MI. We had a very good chat. She will send me digital photos of her new home. They met the neighbors and Kevin really likes the family next door who is into all things geeky, computers, gadgets, etc. Kevin is ten now, very bright and just the sweetest boy. The first picture below is one of my favorites. His father works for the 'Arsenal,' (U.S. Army). That's his dad's cap. I do not know why my photos won't center but it's getting on my nerves. John!!!

Hmmm. Maybe I figured it out. lol Forget that yodel call John. lol


This is a photo of Mr. Perry, Republican running for President. He's eating a corn dog. lol Shades of Bush, God help us. Another faux cowboy in the White House. Do we need that? I mean, really?

The weekly battles between Obama who is seeming a bit wimpy and the 'just say NO' Republicans continues this week over the night the President will make his 'jobs' speech. We, Americans, need JOBS. Please, both sides, do something!

Well, enough carrying on for tonight. Hope you have a wonderful weekend, that God whispers in your ear often and that you have peace. :) And, as always...

Days of Our Lives

Days of our Lives, name of a soap opera that I now watch because there's nothing else good on during that time while I'm lying in a dialysis chair. As soaps go, it's not bad. There are some good-looking guys to help me not notice the bad plots.

Today, I'm very introspective of my own life, the good, the bad and the ugly, the ugly being the first 15 years, the rest pretty good, sometimes great. That's how lives go for most of us I guess.

I have loved and been loved and am loved. That alone has made life worth living.





This is 'E.J.' on Days ... so good lookin. :)

Meanwhile...

One of my writing dot com friends wrote this poem which I like very much. It explains my current feelings so well.

You
And
I
One of you, one of I,
One of choice, one of pride,
One of beauty, one of steel,
One of loving, one of chill,

One of hopeful dreams and means,
One of artistic laden schemes,
One of needing, One of seeking,

You of I, I of you,
You of spirit, I of truth
Two loves,
You,
And,
I.
--MDuci

Things to do not have to be perfect in a relationship to be good. I try not to throw away the good because of a blemish or two. Love is love and it is not the same for everyone, not the same at every moment, not even the same at the end, but love is to be cherished, appreciated, thought of, sung about, cried over, longed for and prayed to God about, thankful for. I am content in that.

I had a wonderful weekend with my good friend and his children. We went to our old church together. He sang his 'theme song,' Who Am I? Love that song.

Click Here for 'Who Am I'

I did a lot of cooking to be prepared for the weekend, mostly sweets.



This one is Chocolate and Peanut Butter Ice Cream pie. One big piece is enough to cause a coronary. :) Essentially, you make a large block of frozen ice cream in a nice big pie plate. You make a fudge candy with peanut butter in it. While still warm, you pour it over the ice cream. Voila! Delicious. What is not eaten should be stored in the fridge.

The children were given a little but we all enjoyed it.

The old adage, 'time flies' seemed true this weekend. So much love and laughter and then time 'was up.' They are gone and I have my memories. I have a store house of good memories when I need to think of pleasant things.

Hope you had a nice weekend, hope no one was overly affected by the storm Irene. My many friends in Virginia were affected one way or the other, most by the power outage. I am so glad and thankful Irene was not as bad as predicted. Lots and lots of rain and Vermont seems to have had the most devastation. God bless them.

Until the next day of our lives ....

Thief in the Night

Re 3:3 Remember therefore how thou hast received and heard, and hold fast, and repent. If therefore thou shalt not watch, I will come on thee as a thief, and thou shalt not know what hour I will come upon thee.

I was reminded of this verse Tuesday when I heard of the earth quake in Virginia, the first in many, many years. People were not expecting it. It came like 'a thief,' Fortunately, although it's epicenter was in Virginia and it reached all the way up the coast to NY and beyond, it did not do that much damage in the way of disability or death. I have many family and friends in Virginia and immediately began to call them when I heard the news. Cell phones were down, land lines were tied up so it took a while before I could feel calm about the situation. Finally, I got in touch with my loved ones who were a bit shaken but all right.

I hope to be more prepared for the Lord's coming with the same love which I had when I wrapped my arms around the Lord and His gospel. How are we to be prepared for His coming?

We must hold fast the truths which we received when we were saved and keep the 'true' religion. We are to repent of any sin, any time that we have departed from the truth of the gospel.

I accepted Jesus as my Savior when I was but seven years old, but I was completely aware of what I was doing. I was baptized in a creek on a cold November day. Just as they were about to dip me in the water, a beautiful doe walked into the water and looked at the small crowd gathered and the people singing 'We shall gather at the river...' She did not seem afraid, nor were we and they took me under the water. I arose from the water re-born, a new creature and felt heaven-bound already :) In all these many years, despite trials and tribulations, the loss of my mate and now my health, my faith has not left me and I cling closer than ever. I thank God for being able to endure through the years for many, many people have tried to sway me, and many situations and temptations. Every time I even thought of turning away from Him, I remembered the old hymn, 'Trust and Obey (for there's no other way, to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey). When you think of it that way, it's very simple, no shades of truth, no political corrctness, no 'tolerance,' etc. Just trust (his Word) and obey.

Today is a non-dialysis day, zippity do dah! :) I got up very early so as not to miss a possible waking moment. I have dusted and picked up a bit, have bread pudding that smells of cinnamon and warmth in the oven, and now have the rest of the day for my 'like to do' list. I like to surf the web, watch a couple shows on TV, read, eat, talk to friends either on the phone or chat and just fool around until bed time when I read the Bible and pray. Doesn't sound like an exciting life to some but to one who was pronounced dead for a few minutes less than a year ago, it sounds wonderful and to do 'my thing' without a lot of pain is even more wonderful.

This Sunday, my dearest friend and his family will visit. I can barely wait. I have made his little Anna a couple outfits I hope she can wear. I hope she likes them. There's a good bit of summer left in Virginia but I've also made her a 'blankie' for cool evenings. I have gifts for the other children, too, of course.

I have plenty of sweets on hand but not for the children. :) I look forward to us all going to our old church and maybe John will sing for us. I miss those days a lot.

Nothing exciting to tell today except that Jesus Lives! Hope you all are having a great day and do so throughout the weekend.

Until the next time,

Black bus, huh?

I am a news hound. I admit it. Every day, I watch at least five newscasts, three times a day. ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN and MSNBC. Sometimes I go read Yahoo news if I feel something has not been covered totally.

Yesterday, all day long, I heard about the one-million dollar black bus to carry 'protectees' when they are out and about in our great nation. Maybe it's just me, but it seems that having a big, black, shiny bus carrying our dear black President around is like putting a bull's eye on his back! Any rogue wing nut, angry mob of tea party'ers, jhadist here or there with access to a grenade launcher, etc. could look around and see the big black bus and think, 'Yowza, Thank Allah, 'hot damn', whatever', a protectee is aboard,' and blow the bus to smithereens. I think the bus is a good idea and probably saves money since before now they leased a bus, outfitted it with all the modern technology, and then un-outfitted it when the trip was over, very expensive, but a big, black, shiny bus? I think not. lol

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One of several things I collect is teapots. I have long since run out of surfaces to display my little pots but that does not stop me from accumulating them. When I am very old and fall asleep and die in my computer chair, I fear they will not be able to transport me to the funeral home because I will be surrounded by zillions of tea pots. I love them. Neither of these pots are that expensive but I like the paint jobs on both and the little frog is charming. Both were given to me by very special friends which make them much more 'expensive' and lovable to me. Do you collect anything? If so, why?

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Today is a non-dialysis day and I have so many things I want to do. I usually start every day with prayer and Bible study. When I study the Bible, I always have so many questions, and I don't think it fair to constantly be writing John about them so I try to figure them out myself with the help of study guides, commentaries, etc. Some answers are elusive though? Like, what really happened to the 30 pieces of silver given to Judas. Imagine if one was a coin collector back then, what a find those would be! If love is not jealous, but God is a 'jealous' God, how can God be love as the scriptures say? I have a vague idea of the answer but not sure. I think it hinges on the definition of 'jealous.' What verse is the most contentious, most misunderstood, most often quoted scripture you know of? I think it is the verse, 'judge not lest thou be judged.' What verse do you think most misunderstood?

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Well, it's 10:26 a.m. and I have so much I need/want to do (my Mensa newsletter just arrived and wonderful puzzles await), the maintenance man is coming by to put up my new curtain rods, my socks are soaking and need washed (I like snow-white socks to remain snow white) and I have a peach cobbler in the oven :), so adieu, adios, later alligator until next time.

Once again, thanks for visiting and

Submission? Get real...

Michelle Bachman was asked about her comment on TV about submitting to her husband. I would have more respect for her had she stuck to her guns. She now says she and her husband think submission means 'respect.' From her previous comments, it was clear she mean 'to submit' as in Ephesians 5:22 in the Bible.

Verse 22. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands.

This is the stand of most evangelical faiths, of which Bachman is one.

"The duty of the submission of the wife to her husband is everywhere in the Scriptures. See 1Pe 3:1; Col 3:18, and Tit 2:5. While Christianity designed to elevate the character of the wife, and to make her a fit companion of an intelligent and pious husband, it did not intend to destroy all subordination and authority. Man, by the fact that he was first created; that the woman was taken from him; that he is better qualified for ruling than she is, is evidently designed to be at the head of the little community that constitutes a family. In many other things woman may be his equal; in loveliness, and grace, and beauty, and tenderness, and gentleness, she is far his superior; but these are not the qualities adapted for government. Their place is in another sphere; and there, man should be as cautious about invading her prerogative, or abridging her liberty, as she should be about invading the prerogative that belongs to him. In every family there should be a head--some one who is to be looked up to as the counselor and the ruler; some one to whom all should be subordinate. God has given that prerogative to man; and no family prospers where that arrangement is violated. Within proper metes and limits, therefore, it is the duty of the wife to obey, or to submit herself to her husband. Those limits are such as the following:

1. In domestic arrangements, the husband is to be regarded as the head of the family; and he has a right to direct as to the style of living, the expenses of the family, the clothing, etc.

2. In regard to the laws which are to regulate the family, he is the head. It is his to say what is to be done; in what way the children are to employ themselves, and to give directions in regard to their education, etc.

3. In business matters, the wife is to submit to the husband. She may counsel with him, if he chooses; but the affairs of business and property are under his control, and must be left at his disposal.

4. In everything, except that which relates to conscience and religion, he has authority. But there his authority ceases. He has no right to require her to commit an act of dishonesty, to connive at wrong-doing, to visit a place of amusement which her conscience tells her is wrong, nor has he a right to interfere with the proper discharge of her religious duties. He has no right to forbid her to go to church at the proper and usual time, or to make a profession of religion when she pleases. He has no right to forbid her endeavoring to exercise a religious influence over her children, or to endeavor to lead them to God. She is bound to obey God, rather than any man, and when even a husband interferes in such cases, and attempts to control her, he steps beyond his proper bounds, and invades the prerogative of God, and his authority ceases to be binding. It ought to be said, however, that in order to justify her acting independently in such a case, the following things are proper:

(1.) It should be really a case of conscience--a case where the Lord has plainly required her to do what she proposes to do--and not a mere matter of whim, fancy, or caprice.

(2.) When a husband makes opposition to the course which a wife wishes to pursue in religious duties, it should lead her to re-examine the matter, to pray much over it, and to see whether she cannot, with a good conscience, comply with his wishes.

(3.) If she is convinced that she is right, she should still endeavor to see whether it is not possible to win him to her views, and to persuade him to accord with her, see 1Pe 3:1. It is possible that, if she does right, he may be persuaded to do right also.

(4.) If she is constrained, however, to differ from him, it should be with mildness and gentleness. There should be no reproach, and no contention. She should simply state her reasons, and leave the event to God.

(5.) She should, after this, be a better wife, and put forth more and more effort to make her husband and family happy. She should show that the effect of her religion has been to make her love her husband and children more; to make her more and more attentive to her domestic duties, and more and more kind in affliction. By a life of pure religion, she should aim to secure what she could not by her entreaties--his consent that she should live as she thinks she ought to, and walk to heaven in the path in which she believes that her Lord calls her" (Barnes Commentary)

I was brought up in a fundamentalist Baptist tradition and wives submitting to their husbands was taught and seemed (seems) natural to me. In fact, I like it. lol I like big, bold, arrogant, confident, strong men, always have, always will. I don't know too many women these days who do and I consider it their loss. :)

A picture of Bill and our newborn daughter





One of my favorite pictures of my husband, Bill
with daughter, Jayne

Either way, on the question of submission, wonder why Bachman blinked? If she can 'claim' the phrase 'pray away the gay,' why not 'submission?'

Moving right along. I'm going to watch Letterman, knit a while and then go to bed. Tomorrow is a dialysis day.